Best advice I have been given:

In regards to Divorce. The anger. The pain. The frustration.

You’re mad someone stole your ticket to the Titanic

It was a “Holy shit” moment.

Fuck yeah I am mad…. wait… the Titanic?

Didn’t that…. siiiiink OHHHHHHH. Yeah…

Wait.

Let it marinate.

You are falling apart and raging mad because someone kept you from getting on or staying on a sinking ship. That is like being upset with medicine for making you healthy.

And they are right.

If my relationship crumbled and was riddled with infidelity and resentment, it was not going to stay a float. Whether it be now, or later that ship will sink. Why focus on the anger anymore, knowing that the destination be it now, or in a decade was the same. As time went on it would only have been worse. The boy would have been older, he would be exposed to the cracks in our relationship. He would remember the fights, the fallout.

In my travels I meet people going through this same journey and I find it my mission to help them. Because I know how it feels and I know one of the helpful saving graces I cling to in this battle has been knowing that phrase.

Be angry, but don’t stay there. That ship may not have sunk yet, you might have thought it to be unsinkable, but all it takes is a few flaws and the security you had is unraveled. It is best to never set sail than to have to jump off a sinking ship.

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