Obviously this is some forward thinking. Something that I had troubles doing. I got anxious looking into the future. Scared. … Continue reading Heather’s Rules of Engagement
I keep telling him he doesn’t understand what it’s like to be the “Mom” me. He gets snippets. Quick bursts … Continue reading Operation: Toddler Proof My Boyfriend
Warning: This is a ranting whiny relationshipy post. Sorry.
I’ve known this fact but denied it for months. I feel I can no longer continue my journey with J.
I wanted this to work. Not because it was convenient. Not because it was a rebound. Not because I need it.
I cannot for the life of me get a good positive groove back.
I am obsessed with nit picking and obsessing on the negative.
I am pretty sure I am in the middle of destructing my relationship with J. I have been cold, passive aggressive, frustrated. Continue reading “Blegh.”
I wonder what my life would be like if I just did what he wanted. If I became the woman he was pushing me to be.
I wonder what life would like right now if I handled the cheating better. Sucked it up and forgave him blindly.
::Cue the fuzzy transition to the alternate universe:: Continue reading “Alternate Universe.”
Lets just visit this topic real quick.
First: I am not a good friend. I am bad at calling and texting back. I like my alone time. I also have a kid. That makes on the fly socializing impossible. I am a scatter brain, I forget and I am flaky as fuck.
Second: I avoid confrontation. So if I sense there is a rumble of dissent, I do this thing I call “The dip”. I dip out. Radio silence.
I don’t have a best friend. Continue reading “Friends.”
Cliches annoy me. They roll too easy off the tongue and involve little thought. But they exist because they are mostly true.
They say that:
Home is where the heart is.
It’s like a stupid sign I would hang in the living room as a decoration. I had certainly bought into that idea without putting thought into. Like, yes my address where I live is also where my family lives. And until the divorce the idea of “Home” was simply a structure with walls and roof. A home was a thing you paint and fill. Something you pay for and something you can sell. Continue reading “Home.”